Saturday, June 2, 2007

You might be from Central Pennsylvania if...

Several years ago, a friend sent me an e-mail entitled, "You might be from Central Pennsylvania if...." For those of you not so blessed to call that area your home, you may not catch all of the humor in the post below; but I have listed some of the (I think) funnier things from the e-mail here. NOTE: Scrapple, while considered by some to be edible, is perhaps the most vile "food" on the earth. Self-respecting dogs turn up their noses at it. Red beet eggs are only marginally better. But at least they can be classified as edible...barely.

Here is the list. Enjoy!

You know you're from Central Pennsylvania if:

1. You have an uncontrollable urge to buy bread and milk when you hear the word "snow."

2. You say the correct pronunciation LANG-kist-er instead of Lan-CAST-er, and LEB-en-in instead of Leb-a-NON.

3. You know the only way to make good fastnachts is to cook them in LARD.

4. You live within two miles of a plant that makes potato chips, corn chips, pretzels, candy, or ice cream, or that packages turkeys, beans, or bologna.

6. You do things "once," as in "I'll go check in the back room once."

8. You know what REAL pot pie is.

9. YOUR turkey has "filling," not "stuffing," and most certainly NOT "dressing."

10. You know that chicken corn soup from a fire house is the most nearly perfect food on earth.

11. Your neighbors' names are Driebelbis, Stoltfus, Lebo, Peachey, Yoder, Brubaker or anything ending in "-baugh or -ouch."

12. You say things like, "I'm calling off today," and "They're calling for snow."

13. You've heard of distelfinks and hex signs.

14. Red Beet Eggs makes your list of top ten favorite foods.

15. You pronounce "Suite" as SUIT, not SWEET.

16. You say you're going out to the shed "AWHILE," instead of "FOR AWHILE."

18. You think the roads in any other state are smooth.

19. You know the Penn State cheer. (WE ARE...PENN STATE!)

20. Hearing horses clopping down a paved street doesn't bring you to the window to see what's going on outside.

21. You never see any Confederate Flags, except on the Gettysburg Battlefield.

22. You prefer Hershey's Chocolate to Godiva.

23. You consider Pittsburgh to be "out west," and you know the fastest way to Philly is the Turnpike.

24. School closings due to snow take the radio stations a half an hour to finish, because just about every town has its own school district.

25. When someone says 1972, you think "Agnes," and when someone says 1979, you think "TMI."

26. You call sloppy joes "barbecue."

28. When it snows, they put cinders on the roads instead of sand.

29. You know what scrapple is and you still like to eat it.

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